by Flemming Funch
Oh, my genotype is fine, thank you. Hasn't changed much recently, but one never knows. I might evolve a few more twirls on the short arm of chomosome fourteen. Maybe I'll even change phylum, if it strikes me one day.
Now, it was just a spam e-mail. I can see that right away, even if it made it through all my spam filters rather unscathed. But as it showed a snippet of the actual message too, I was intrigued and opened it. And it is pure brilliance.
Oh, the actual message they were trying to get through was horrible. One of those scammy stock recommendations, which is meant for making a bunch of idiots buy some stock, so that the price goes up, and the spammer's put options become gold.
No, what is brilliant is all the random content they stick into the message to get through spam filters. I love mysteriously meaningful randomness. And these guys have fun algorithms.
They include a gif image with random junk, with the title "impingecourtesan martinsonstroke contagionschwab". Ah, that's beautiful.
The message is sent from the non-existent mail server, "casebook.frog.mesa.isotropy.es", which also introduces itself as "anthracnose.mail.brunnet.net". Ah, that's neat. Anthracnose, I couldn't have thought of that if I tried. Casebook.frog.mesa.isotropy? That's deep!
Names, e-mail addresses, server names, everything is wonderfully randomized, to sound strangely real and unreal at the same time.
The message has three different mime-encoded parts. One, the plain text version, contains only the single word "poop". That's what the poor suckers without HTML e-mail would see. "Poop". That's intriguing, of course, but not as philosophically deep as the rest.
Now, the HTML section has the catchy title "explanatoryhoagie flynnsprint". Yeah, that's good, and inspires continued reading, although nobody really ever sees the HTML title in an e-mail.
Then, at the bottom of the e-mail, after the stock message, it has the random literary section. A mashed compilation of some kind of classic novel, or maybe several. This is where you find such gems as:
My aunt always excused any weakness of her own in my behalf, by county, in this way pretty kettle of fish. In pursuance of my aunts kind scheme, I was shortly afterwards fitted out like living, they tell me, on a sand heap underneath a burning glass. He looked strong. I knew you immediately, I said, but you are more easily remembered to walk across me more like a fly than a human being while the horses were at a canter. He is often very nervous, or I fancy so. It is not fancy said Sara, shaking her head. Have my place, so I blushingly offered to resign it
What literary genius! I too want to be fitted like living on a sand heap underneath a burning glass. I want to walk across you more like a fly than a human being. I will blushingly resign my place, even if it is not fancy.
Maybe I should install this kind of program to answer my e-mail. Write my blog posts, even. Impingecourtesan.
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